introspects...

today was a milder version of the usual hot and humid august. usual jam-packed morning since we have to squeeze our work into six hours each day... sometimes only four hours for me if i have to go to my boss' new chocolate shop. stay there until 5 or 6. realization no. 1: distraction freezes depression

i tasted that piece of heaven called chocolate cheesecake jam again. this time being caught, hehe... i told her i was thinking of showing the middle part (where i bit) to show what's inside the chocolate when i make the brochures. no more arguments there, she thought i was officially working ^_^. realization no. 2: murphy's law is always in action


so these past few days i've been having nightmares that wakes me up in the middle of the night and squeeze myself into my husband's arms. but i usually forget them in the morning. realization no. 3: fear subsides when you are hugged

i also miss jared most these days. sometimes too emotional it's become oa. i don't want to have moss' aura of constant depression, as in everyday. comfort her today, tomorrow she's still the same. but sometimes i realize i've become like that to bambi, and he has given up the reassurances and the comforting. maybe moss is contagious...

i don't understand why she repeatedly goes back to the part of her that hurts. and i don't like if i will someday be like that. if she is contagious, then i better stay away, a little each day. realization no. 3: you could be influenced by depressed friends


look at my current mood. i found punkmoods again. how touching to have a drawing of how you are feeling on a certain day...